I am writing to you because it is raining and I didn't expect it to rain but I know it will stop so I just want to remember that it is raining and I bet you do too. In fact, I should be happy that it is raining but I'm not, because I know it will stop and that my life will go on. Right now, my life is a blur. But I still have time to be indifferent to my friends and them to decide that I am a third wheel and that they, are going to be mean(to me). I didn't mean to get myself in this situation but I guess it just comes with growing up. So I'm writing to you in this pagan journal knowing that my "friends" will always be "fair weather" friends and that girls are weird. I'm trying to sort my feelings out but whenever I'm on the verge of a collapse, I go to school on Thursdays and see boys. And all my feelings lock up inside me in my deepest depths. I've also learned that your family and God will always stick with you, forever, because they are cool like that and friends aren't. In fact, so called "Christian" "friends" don't act like they are Christians, yet you're with them anyway. I wish people other than me would recognize the stupidity of these people. But alas, only me. So I'm stuck here writing to you, telling you that girls suck and that boys have the emotional range of a teaspoon.